UT visit recap

Howdy yall! See, I'd fit right in at UT ;-)


I got back yesterday from my interview visit to UT. Overall, the experience was definitely a positive one. Out of a pool of around 180 applicants (they average 150-200 each year), they selected around 30 of us to come and meet the faculty.


First up, we had a welcome event with current and prospective students. I had to totally set aside any shy tendencies I have...I simply walked up to the first person I saw and introduced myself. (That's basically what I did all weekend lol.) The actual interviews (we each had 3 interviews with a member of the faculty) were pretty informal and felt more like conversations than interviews. The "important" interview was the one with the faculty whose research interests most closely aligned to mine (which, btw, is looking at the experience and impact of racial/ethnic identity development for individuals of mixed-race or mixed-culture background). It turns out that he was biracial as well! Obviously I don't expect this to help/harm me either way, but it was a nice coincidence. He seemed very interested in the subject.


I really enjoyed meeting the current and prospective students. I didn't get to see too much of the city, but I saw a bit of the campus - which is straight up huuuuge! Over 50,000 students; over 300 acres.


Now that I've interviewed it's more waiting. While I feel good about how the interviews went, I don't by any means feel that my acceptance is a sure thing. They should be announcing admission decisions within the next 1-2 weeks....but it's somewhat complicated because an offer could be made to someone who decides not to accept, which would open back up that spot.


I have my other interview 2 weeks from this Friday. I will definitely be disappointed (not to mention embarrased lol) if I don't get into any of the grad schools, but I understood from the beginning that this was going to be a stretch. In any case, I'm proud of how far I've gotten in the process, and all I can do is hope for the best. Que sera, sera!



Today's *big chune* comes from reggae artist Tessane Chin, most well-known for another serious big chune "Hideaway" . She was on my mind because she does lead vocals in the new Haiti tribute song by Caribbean artists. This one is called "Messenger."



:-D
 

Posting from my phone. My interviews went well. Back to DC manana. I'll write more then :)

Austin here I come!

Hey yall!

No real post today...I'm getting ready to head out to Austin for my first grad school interview....yikes! Hopefully I'll have some good news to share sometime soon. I don't expect that I'll be blogging while I'm out there, so look for the next post on Saturday or Sunday....Holla!

today's *big chune* is pretty fitting....it's called "Closer" by Goapele. Love this song...and if you're looking for more good Goapele, check out "First Love" another big chune. By the way, she's also mixed lol...mother is Jewish, father is South African :-)

i want to be a know-it-all ...

...(or at least a know-a-lot)

Every time I learn something (is it redundant to say "learn something new"?), I have two main reactions: 1) happiness that i now know something i previously had not known and 2) worry (worry is a sort of a strong word, i just can't think of what comes right below it in the emotion hierarchy) about how much more i still don't know! Nix (read in an article and) told me just the other day that young people today are exposed to more information in a day than our grandparents were in a whole year....uhm, is that mind-boggling to anyone else??!


While I consider myself generally well-informed and knowledgeable about a good many things, I still can't help but feeling overwhelmed by the vast amount of information that exists. I realize this may sound crazy, but oh well. How did this come up?

I'm sitting here at work, reading through some documents on Social Security Reform for an upcoming paper we are supposed to write. (By the way, nothing is happening with SS reform, in case you are wondering...soooo basically I am doing lots of reading and "monitoring" and who knows whether anything will come of it. Oh well, I'm learning!) Most people our age have no reason to know or be especially concerned about this, but every year the Social Security Administration adjusts SS benefits to account for changes in the cost of living (related to inflation). In 2009, there was no Cost-of-Living-Adjustment...not because the SSA was being stingy, but because prices had dropped during the recession, effectively increasing the real purchasing power of SS benefits by around $700. In fact, during the recession, seniors actually saw their incomes "rise" as those for working-age households fell...I know what you're thinking....tell that to the old people who can't afford to pay their bills :-/ President Obama was thinking that too (lol), so he had proposed a $250 payments to all retirees...politically a good idea, not so much from an economicists' POV...but if Larry Summers were to be like "eh, I don't know Barack, that's not economically sound"...how do you think that would have been received by the general public?


Anyway, all of this is to say that when I read things like this, it reaffirms my resolve to be fully informed about something before taking a strong stance on it. I'm pretty indecisive (btw, research suggests that indecisive individuals utilize more information when trying to make a decision compared to decisive individuals LOL), and I tend not to see black/white, right/wrong on most issues....this is frustrating to some people (I'm thinking of one person in particular, and we don't get along at all lol) but it is really hard for me to be absolute about issues - especially hot-button issues like creation/evolution, religion, war, abortion, affirmative action, etc.(basically most things that involved "taking sides").


I actually used to be even more evasive about getting into "issue discussions." When I really think about it, I realize that my fear of ignorance/being wrong has a ton to do with this....this, in turn, fed into my shyness years ago (I wouldn't say I'm shy anymore). I grew up in a family with 3 super-smart, super-opinionated older brothers. Honestly, I was intimidated by this and I avoided (I sort of still do lol) getting involved in their heated conversations. The older and more educated/informed I've gotten, the more confident (in general, not just about conversations) and less shy I've gotten. I realized the two are correlated for me. Now, I love talking to people about a range of topics, because for the most part I believe that I am able to add something meaningful to the conversations. It's a great feeling.


When I was at GTown, I remember a professor talking about how being an "expert" simply means that you know more than the average person about a certain topic. I used to think of being an expert as some sort of unattainable title, fit only for geniuses. This isn't really the case. One of my goals in life is to become an expert in something(s).  This is why I follow so many blogs and make such an effort to be informed. I enjoy knowing things and being able to share them with others. When people comment on my "knowing things" and "informedness" (yes, i'm aware that's not a real word), it makes my day :-)

I hope one day I'll be an expert in some specific area of Psychology, but I'd also like to be an expert in something fun, like Positivity, or Autobiographical Literature, or baking...or needle point (lol).

What about yall? Do you ever feel overwhelmed by how much there is to know...and daunted by a sense of how much you don't know? (Or is it just me?) Do you strive to be an expert in something? Maybe you already are? Other thoughts?

Today's *big chune* is the song that initially made me fall in love with Chrisette Michele: Like a Dream. I LOVE this song!! She's on my mind because yesterday I got tickets to see her when she comes to DC (at the 9:30 club) next Tuesday...with Laura Izibor, who was yesterday's big chune...YAY! Anyone else going?


 :-D
 

end of the blog challenge

So today is Day 30 of my 30-day blog challenge! And aside from the day I technically posted after midnight (which I am still counting as a post for the day before) I met my challenge. Go me, go me. lol. Anyway, I am really happy that I started this blog and have been posting every day for the past month.


About a week ago I signed up for Google Analytics, which allows you to look at traffic to your blog. Not only is it sort of confusing, and not really that informative (IMO, or maybe I was just lazy with it), I realized that I don't really care whether 5 people or 500 people read my blog unless I could make some money out of this, that would be sweeeet. I'm basically writing this for myself....because it's something I've been wanting to do. At the same time, it is so encouraging when people let me know (whether in the comments section, or privately) that they enjoy reading my blog....it makes my day ;-)

One person told me they like reading because, in a way, it makes them feel more connected to me, since we don't talk on a daily basis. Two other friends caught up to the blog somewhat late and emailed me with responses to almost every post I had written. Things like this really mean a lot to me, and make me feel good about writing...thank you so much! I've really enjoyed posting so far, and I plan to continue to write on pretty much a daily basis. I hope yall will continue to read :-) By the way, for those of you who don't use Google Reader, what is wrong with you? didn't you read this post? you can now subscribe to get email alerts every time I post something new....just use the box to the left. Also for those of you who don't use a Reader, you can still see the items I am sharing, look to the left side of the blog page and you can see my most recently shared items.


On another note, today as I was sitting at my desk, looking at the forecast for the next 10 days, I thought back to a few days ago when I was sitting in B&N with Nix and Roomie and asked them where on St. Thomas, they would rather be. While pretty much anywhere on a tropical island beats DC right now (lol), I picked a very specific spot. All the way at the West end of the island there is an area called Botany Bay. It used to be private homes (or maybe a hotel?), but developers have since bought it (like they buy every other good parcel on the island) and are doing whatever developers do with it. Anywho, since my pops knows everyone and their mother on the island, we somehow were able to go down there (this was before the developers bought it) and spend a day enjoying it. It is super secluded because it's as far west on the island as you can go. Anyway, there is a little neck of land that connects the main land mass to another tiny tiny island...it's kinda crazy but it's basically like a strip of sand with a beach shore on either side...and the sick thing is that one side is the Atlantic Ocean and one side is the Caribbean Sea.

View Larger Map
You can literally walk a few steps across the sand and be in either one. Obviously this is a geographic technicality, but I think it's pretty cool :-)


Anyway all of that rambling was to say: I'd love to be somewhere warm right about now!! Good thing I have some higher temperatures in my upcoming travels this weekend: yay!


I really wanted today's big chune to be "Stand Firm" by Lutan Fyah, but I can't find it on youtube :-/ Maybe I have the wrong song name...anyone know the song I'm talking about and whether it's called something else? Oh well. Instead, today's *big chune* is from up-and-coming artist Laura Izibor. She's half-Irish, half-Nigerian which obviously makes me like her even more lol. Her song From My Heart To Yours got some play, but I don't think she's really gotten much publicity in the US yet. Here's her song and video for "Don't Stay":



:-D
  

what it means to be an introvert

Blog Challenge Day 29

One of the most interesting aspects of personality is introversion versus extroversion. It's also a lot easier to "get" that someone is an introvert or extrovert, than whether they are a "thinker" or a "feeler." At the same time, the issue of introversion vs. extroversion also carries its own misunderstandings.

While we all use both our introverted and extroverted skills, we're hardwired to be more one than the other. "Introverts" merely have a preference for the introverted function, but there is no implication that one preference is "better" than the other. 

I am an introvert, remember :-) (If you're not sure whether you have introverted personality traits, try this test for introversion.) And while I definitely feel like an introvert, some people are surprised to hear this because they think of introverts as being shy/aloof, maybe even awkward. I actually used to be pretty shy, but I don't think I am anymore. I'm definitely an introvert though!

Swiss Psychiatrist Carl Jung -- "the Father of psychological types" -- explained introversion as an "attitude-type" in which a person tends to focus inward, and derive their energy from going within to their own thoughts, rather than from external sources, such as people and events. Our society is predominantly extroverted, however. According to various sources, Introverts account for anywhere from 25-40% of the population...and we tend to regard any majority as "normal" and a minority as "different." So, Introverts are often viewed anywhere from "a bit different" to "defective and antisocial." The terms "loner," "aloof" and "snobbish" are also often used in connection with introverts. Basically, there just seems to be a negative connotation associated with being an introvert.

So today's post is about introversion...explaining what it is and what it isn't. 

I really like this summary:

• Introverts think. We think a lot....Sometimes we like thinking more than talking or socializing. Sometimes we like to think too much. I definitely think a lot. I'm very introspective. I get "lost in thought" all the time. An introvert's personality traits aren't necessarily tentative or hesitant, but introverts do prefer to think before they act. When introverts are ready they take action! I definitely identify with this.
• Introverts can be entertained by their own thoughts. You might think of this as "intertainment". LOL. I like that word.  
• Introverts are not dependent on having other people around to keep themselves amused. You'll rarely hear me say that I'm bored. Some people may find a quiet day/night at home to be unbearable, but I love to spend time like that.  
• Introverts find interaction with other people to be tiring or draining after a period of time. Extroverts generally feel happy and energized around other people and they "wilt" without interaction with other people.
• Introverts usually need time to "recharge" their internal batteries after being around other people. Time alone watching TV, reading a book, listening to music, or otherwise contemplating things in solitude will refresh the introvert.

To clear up a few misconceptions about introverts:

• Introverts do like other people, usually in moderation.  LOL - this seems pretty dramatic (it's not my language).  
• Introverts do have feelings. In many cases they have very powerful feelings, but they may tend to process them in solitude. 
• Introversion is not the same thing as shyness. Shy people are afraid of interacting with other people, probably due to a lack of self-confidence and comfort, but at the same time they crave love and affection. Introverts aren't afraid of interacting with other people and they aren't afraid to speak their mind when needed. As a general tendency, however, introverts tend to prefer small groups. This very much applies to me. Some introverts aren't stereotypically shy and can strike up conversations with anyone. Introverts can find small talk easy but tiring – and sometimes boring. They'd rather have meaningful conversations about the depths of human souls and minds (lol). I like to explain this by using the example of being at a party or social event. You definitely won't find me in the middle of all the action. I'm more likely to be having a conversation with one person or a small group. 
• Introverts are not all alike. Extroverts are not all alike. It's possible to have a mix of introverted and extroverted personality traits. It's possible to have a slight tendency towards one or the other. It's also possible to be strongly oriented toward introversion or extroversion.

Here are some more info points:

• introverts have an inward focus and aren't usually the life of the party
• they have a strong sense of self that can make them feel highly self-conscious around other people – making walking into a crowded room a little nerve-wracking
• introverts have a hard time being goofy in front of the camera and telling jokes to more than a couple of people at a time, but they can be extremely witty. 

But that doesn't mean introverts' personality traits are neurotic.

• introverts process their emotions, thoughts, and observations internally
• they can be social people, but reveal less about themselves than extroverts do
• introverts are more private, and less public
• introverts need time to think before responding to a situation, and develop their ideas by reflecting privately
• introverts' personality traits can be passionate, but not usually aggressive.
• introverts can focus their attention more readily and for longer periods of time, and they aren't easily swayed by other people's opinions.

According to Laney, author of The Introvert Advantage, there are several advantages to being an introvert: 

• work well with others, especially in one-to-one relationships
• maintain long-term friendships
• flexible
• independent
• strong ability to concentrate
• self-reflective
• responsible
• creative, out-of-the-box thinking
• analytical skills that integrate complexity
• studious and smart

Introvert or Extrovert, the best thing you can do is to be yourself! (First you have to know what that self is.) Know your strengths/shortcomings and how these different characteristics may be influenced by your environment. Jung observed and reported that there were significant and troublesome risks associated with falsifying type (not being yourself), including low self-esteem; confusion with respect to the identity of the self and its gifts; fatigue and depression; general health problems; and a lack of synchronicity between a person's life and their chosen direction or career.

I have today off (for those of you keeping track at home, this is going to be a 2-day work week for me. Thursday/Friday, I'm going to interview at one of the schools to which I applied...wish me luck!) so I've been trying *and failin) to be productive...basically I've been reading blogs and watching tv lol. Anyway, Jill Scott's The Way came on VH1 soul, and I had forgotten how much I like this song....so it's today's *big chune*


:-)
 

your most important Valentine

Blog Challenge: Day 28

I know I'm late posting but I had a busy (but awesome) day/night!! Nix, Roomie and I made an great lunch (Salmon with mango-kiwi relish - yum!) and baked 3 different types of cookies - which were each pure goodness lol. Then we all went to see the chick flick on steroids Valentine's Day - it was super cute and the perfect movie for use to see. On the way home from the movie, Roomie said she didn't want the day to end...IMMD! Then, I had a really nice dinner with a friend (this is me not getting too personal on my blog since my readership has expanded lolol). The day was great. 

I also know I said I would use Sundays as a random roundup of links/articles/stories, but since today is Valentine's Day I figured I'd go ahead and post on something related to the day. One of my favorite quotes is from Sex and The City, when Carrie says: "...the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous." Even though a lot of what Carrie says is super corny, I really find this quote to be true. Some people are serial monogamists (in a loose sense, b/c true monogamy is increasingly less common these days), while others are serial "daters" or serially single. I'd say I fall into the latter category lol. I have friends that seem constantly to be in a relationship...straight from one relationship to another...and I just don't get it lol....but to each their own. Another thing that scares me is people who are afriad to be alone...who feel that they are not complete without a significant other in their life. Anyway, it sounds cliche, but I think it's important to know and love yourself before you love someone else, or are ready to accept someone else's love. 

With this in mind, here are some tips (from various sources - especially this great post - with my personal spin) on things to do to to work on your self-love.

• Take Time Everyday to Do What You Love - My sister Nix is a full-time student who is super super busy....but she makes it a point to read something non-school-related everyday. This is just an example. Yours doesn't have to be the same thing everyday...as long as it's something enjoyable. 
• Be Yourself: Don't try to fit yourself into everyone else's ideals. You are who you are; you like what you like. You shouldn't have to mold yourself to the people around you. Surround yourself by people who appreciate you for who you are. 
• Never Miss an Opportunity to Laugh - I don't think a day goes by without me laughing at least once. There is nothing better than laughing. One of the greatest things is being able to laugh at yourself. Try to find humor all around you....I am probably one of the most easily amused people. Don't take everything so seriously! Yesterday I'm navigating through the snow. This is so childish, but something that cracks me up is when I can find a "that's what he/she said" moment. Nix and Roomie could tell you...I find them quite often lol. 
• Exercise Your Memory - Did you know that recalling happy times helps boost happiness in the present? Just try! I promise you'll agree. I don't think a day goes by without me saying "do you remember when..." Even small things. Today Roomie was cracking up remembering the other day when I got out at a red light to clear off her windshield and fall flat on my butt in the middle of the street. It certainly boost her happiness, and it let me laugh at myself. 
• Be Your Own Best Friend: Beyonce knows what she's talkin' about yall! lol...for real though..."No one knows, not even your closest friend or your spouse, what it's like to be you. To wake up in your skin, to live with the mixture of feelings, thoughts, impulses, dreams, conflicts, and passions, that are utterly unique to you...in the end, it is you, your heart, your guidance, your wisdom that you must trust. Notice what knocks at the door of your heart, what enlivens you, what inspires you, what energizes you. Follow that. Trust that." I totally copied that from the article in the link. Great language! I need to get my writing on that level lol.
• Let go of your mistakes. Mistakes happen. Don't focus on them in a purely negative way. Take what you can from them, learn from them, and keep it moving. 
• Transform your mindset. Believe that you're worthy of blessings...happiness, success, love, whatever! Actively seek out positive things about yourself and your life.  
• Dive into your passion. Whatever it is that gets you really excited, focus on it. Embrace it. One of the best ways you can learn to love yourself is to zero in on the things that make you the happiest and spend as much time as you can on them. 
• Live in your moment. Love yourself by being present. Remember when I talked about what the happiest women do? Focus on your strong moments!
• Toot your own horn. No one wants to be that girl/guy who is all about themselves and their accomplishments...but it's okay to acknowledge that you did an amazing job on something or accomplished something you never thought you could. Celebrate yourself and your achievements! This is much easier and more rewarding when you have a supportive friend network who will allow you the opportunity to feel good about yourself and support you in you celebration.
• Appreciate your life. My tattoo says "I am blessed"...not suggesting you get one too cuz then you'd be a copy cat! but try to make a habit of acknowledging the good in your life.   

Finally, since today is traditionally a day to think about couple relationships, I'd encourage you (especially if you're single or unsure about your present relationship) to look back on past relationships and see what you can learn from them. Make a list of past relationships and note each one the best qualities of that relationship. These are the qualities you want in the next relationship. Make a list of the negative parts of that relationship -- these are what you don't want to repeat. Use the list as a learning tool. It's sometimes tempting to think of past relationships as a waste of time, but try to look in each for the lesson to be learned. Actually, negative parts may have been your greatest teacher ;-) I certainly think I'm better at spotting and avoiding certain characteristics/behavior based on previous guys.

How did yall spend Valentine's Day? Is it just another day to you? What are your thoughts about your "relationship with yourself" as it pertains to your relationships with others? What are some ways that you actively work at your self-love?

You know today's *big chune* has to be lovey-dovey right? lol. It was a toughie because there are soooooo many great love songs out there and I am terrible at making choices like this. In the end, I decided to go with Turn Your Lights Down Low because it's beautiful without being over the top...I'm posting 2 versions (including the original Bob Marley version) cuz I feel like most people have only heard the version with Lauren...and I love The Wailers backup singing in the original lol. But I do love Lauren Hill and her rap verse adds a lil something extra. Btw, I swear if my Dad had dreads, he could double as Bob Marley lolol. 

:-D